Earlier this year, local mom Michelle Icard went viral after writing a note to a group of girls who were trashing fellow classmates as they sat near her at the Cotswald Starbucks.
The note read: “Hi Girls! I sat near you today in Starbucks and listened as you talked. You three are obviously pretty and hard-working. I wish your kindness matched your pretty exteriors. I heard you talk about a girl who sang a song about being lonely in the talent show – and you laughed. About a girl who couldn’t be lead singer because you got all the votes, about crappy presents other people have given you … and you sounded so mean and petty. You are smart and you are pretty. It would take nothing from you to also be kind. – M.”
Michelle dropped off the note and had the barista deliver three mini Frappucinos to the girls’ table (an idea one of her friends suggested after Michelle posted on Facebook about how upset she was over the girls’ behavior), and posted about the experience on her blog. Then it caught on. Thousands and thousands of people shared stories about Michelle’s note, igniting a broader conversation about bullying and “mean girls.”
As many scoop readers and Charlotteans know, that’s not the first time Michelle has tried to help adolescents. In 2014 she wrote the bestselling parenting book “Middle School Makeover: Improving the Way You and Your Child Experience the Middle School Years.” She also has a blog, a website full of resources for parents and kids and she even hosts seminars all around the country. The Charlotte mom of two has also been featured The Today Show, Parents.com, The Washington Post, A Mighty Girl, The Chicago Tribune, The Christian Science Monitor, Your Teen Magazine and Huffington Post.
Here’s what a typical day looks like for Michelle:
7:30 a.m. to 8:30 a.m. … Wake up! I’m lucky that I never had to do early school runs. I rarely use an alarm clock (unless I have an early meeting). When I use an alarm, I might hit snooze once, but I get enough sleep so I’m never fighting to wake up. I love sleep and I’m happiest when I get a lot, so I fall asleep and wake up naturally. I get nine or 9.5 hours a night.
8:31 a.m. … Reach over to my bedside table for my phone. I think the routine as much as the screen light helps me become alert.
8:32 a.m. … I check Facebook, text and email to see what’s new. But I don’t take action right away. After I’ve had my coffee or tea, I’ll start replying. Then I look at my calendar for the day. I hardly know what the week ahead holds and instead tend to think day by day.
8:40 a.m. … Shower, makeup, and blow dry if I’m not working out. If it’s a day when I’m working out, I’ll pull my hair up and throw on a wide headband, a tank and yoga pants, and I’m done.
8:55 a.m. … Get dressed. I never stand in the closet for 45 minutes. I did a wardrobe revamp a few years ago with the help of a stylist (Whitley Hamlin) so now getting dressed is easy. I used to be someone who always thought, “I have nothing to wear.” I honestly did not own a skirt before my first book came out and I thought “I will look crazy on camera if I don’t get help”. So I called in an expert! On days when I’m writing, I still might wear jeans, a t-shirt and flip flops, or workout clothes. But if I have meetings or a presentation, I choose something more fun and appropriate to wear.
9 a.m. … Breakfast time! I am a creature of habit — a very typical breakfast is fresh ground peanut butter spread on a slice of Ezekiel whole grain bread, topped with fresh fruit. My current favorite is mango.
9:15 a.m. … Coffee. Last year I would have driven my son to school, but this fall both kids will be in high school and my daughter will drive. They will leave the house long before I get up, so first thing on my agenda is usually a quick run to Starbucks.Since I work alone, at home, it’s a way to get me out into the world every morning. I go to the one right by my house, but I’m also a big fan of Cow Hollow Coffee, made locally by a friend, so I order that and it comes straight to my mailbox. And my mailbox smells fantastic.
9:30 a.m. … Hit the gym. I used to work out with the amazing Kim Gamble (personal trainer) at her home, but I had a scheduling conflict. Then I started going to Flywheel. I did it for about a year but I’m not competitive and I always felt kind of bad because I usually ranked very low in the class … but not bad or competitive enough to push even harder! Now I’ve landed on Yoga Oasis in Dilworth and I’m really enjoying it. I also use the 7-Minute Workout app on my phone about five times a week. It’s a good way to build strength gradually (more my style than hard core workouts). And I love a brisk walk! I try to get one in four times a week.
10:30 a.m. … Start writing! I am working on my second book, and I contribute articles regularly to several outlets. Plus, there are always lots of emails. I sit in my office chair with a blanket over me and my laptop, and think and write … think and write.
1 p.m. … Break for lunch. I typically make a big salad early in the week and eat it for days. When I get sick of that, I may run and grab a sandwich from Laurel Market.
2:30 p.m. … Who knows? Life is about to change. I used to pick up my daughter from high school at 2:30 and shuttle her around until I had to pick up my son, but now that my daughter is driving I’ll have a much longer work day. I don’t even know what afternoons will look like next year, but I imagine more writing, more emails, errands, and house stuff. Although since I’ll be less tied to a schedule, they may also involve afternoon meetings, yoga and walks.
6 p.m. … Dinner. My husband and I love to cook so we eat at home often. He’s a great gardener so we have lots of good vegetables in the summer. Tonight I made a Chickpea Tikka Masala. But we might have steak, grilled chicken or pasta. Dinner is one time where I don’t love routine. I like to change up the menu a lot. My life would be so much easier if I cooked the same things every week but I’m always trying new recipes. I don’t usually go out during the week unless it’s book club or a work event. Or, if it’s food related – I’ve either bombed at a new recipe or I’m just too tired to cook. We might eat out once during a week (not including weekend).My favorite spots for dinner on the weekend are Good Food on Montford, Wolfgang Puck, and DeeJai. My husband and I like having a drink together (but not every night). I’m a beer girl usually, although my other favorite summer drink is sparkling lime water with vodka and fresh lime. It’s very light and refreshing. If my husband has an easy morning (no early workout) we will have a drink out front after dinner. Sometimes the kids come out and shoot baskets or talk with us. Sometimes the neighbors come out, too. It’s fun living in a cul-de-sac. Then we clean up from dinner and we usually have shows on the DVR to watch. Currently stacking up are “Ray Donovan,” “The Night Of” and “Last Tango in Halifax.”
10 p.m. … Workday is officially over and I fall asleep. My workday can end anywhere between 2 p.m. and 10 p.m., depending on how focused I was during the day or how often I got derailed.
Weekends are for … Adventure! Parties with friends, day trips, sporting events, new places to visit, new restaurants to try. In order to be productive with writing, my week has to be sort of solitary, so I enjoy my weekends being more fun than restful.
